Romantic gestures are common at the beginning of a relationship. Proceed with caution—they may be signs of love bombing, a manipulation tactic in disguise.
Maybe you’re not caught up with all the hip lingo. Allow me to describe the signs of love bombing for you. Love bombing is a technique used at the beginning of many relationships to make your partner fall madly in love with you very quickly.
Essentially, someone who love bombs you showers you with gifts and romantic gestures. They make you feel like this person must be your soul mate. Then? Surprise. You’re in love with a monster.
Some say that there is nothing wrong with love bombing because it simply shows your partner that you care about them. It’s the beginning of a new relationship, so naturally they want to “woo” you and make you feel special. But be careful. You might be falling in love with a mask—not the person standing in front of you holding a bouquet of flowers.
Keep the romance alive but watch for signs of love bombing
This is a fine line to walk. It drastically depends on the person you date. My current boyfriend is a very sweet and sensitive guy, and he loves cute little gifts that show my affection.
When we first started dating, I wrote him short love letters on my old typewriter. He still has them. I made him countless things in the past, and he has everything stored in a box under our bed.
Some people don’t and never did appreciate these things from me. I’ve always been a fairly romantic gal, and I’ve written cute notes to my boyfriends in the past. Many of them didn’t seem to understand the gesture at all. Some thought it strange.
So, you see? I think you really need to understand the person you date, because some people adore romantic gestures, while others think you come on too strong.
If you are a romantic person, like myself, seek out fellow romantics to date, or at least people who appreciate romance. Otherwise, your efforts go to waste and be mistaken with love bombing. When really, that was never your true intention.
Identifying the signs of love bombing in your partner
Now that we understand how to avoid love bombing ourselves, it is important to understand how to avoid love bombing in our partners.
Love bombing is terrifying because most of us don’t even know it is happening. If your boyfriend or girlfriend brings you home a box of chocolates or flowers, you might just think “wow what a sweet guy/girl.”
It’s romantic and intended to make you fall in love. What’s wrong with that? If they are being genuine, nothing. But if they manipulate you into falling for them, this is something to steer clear of.
Learning to identify the following signs of love bombing saves you the heartache, my dears.
#1 Buying your love. I once dated a guy that bought me a new gift every day it seemed, which in theory sounds wonderful. It really just became overwhelming. Sometimes a girl just wants to hang out with a guy, without any gifts exchanged, ya know? If it seems like they constantly buy you gifts to impress you, then you might be a victim of love bombing.