Are you afraid of making a real commitment to your relationship? Use these 10 signs to know if you or a lover is experiencing the fear of commitment.
Are you afraid of commitment?
Do you get cold feet each time you find yourself getting addicted or dependent on someone?
Or worse, do you find that you enjoy dating but hate thinking about the future of a relationship, especially when it comes to marriage?
The fear of commitment can ruin even the best of relationships.
But yet, for most of us, it’s unavoidable, and at times, even inevitable.
A new romance may bloom like a fairy tale, but just when it starts to get serious and nears the happy ending, we panic!
And we begin to wonder if we’re actually ready to commit to something more serious.
What is the fear of commitment?
The fear of commitment has always been a guy thing, but in no way is it an exclusive guy thing.
Women are just as prone to being afraid to commit as men.
But coming to think of it, why are most of us so afraid to get involved in a serious relationship or take the next step towards marriage?
To define it, the fear of commitment is the fear of entering into a long term relationship or the fear of getting married.
But more often than not, most people aren’t really afraid of long term relationships. It’s marriage that petrifies them!
There’s something about holy matrimony and “till death do us part” that shoves cold feet under our torso, and makes us question the longevity of the relationship.
The survival of your relationship and your commitment
If you’re in a long term relationship that’s lasted at least a few years, it’s obvious that the idea of the next stage of marriage will eventually enter your head.
But how do you feel about that? Does it excite you? Or does it scare or annoy you?
If you feel any emotion other than some form of happiness when you think of marrying your lover, you’re probably suffering from the fear of commitment. It’s not a totally bad thing, but it’s definitely not good either.
You need to know this, everything in life is about stages and evolution. To survive, you need to evolve. If you stop evolving, you’ll stagnate. And it’s the same thing with relationships too.
Romance needs to evolve or one of you may get attracted to someone else.
Sexual intimacy has to evolve or one of you may lose interest in having sex with the other.
And just like that, a relationship too has to evolve into marriage or some kind of commitment. If it starts to stagnate, it’s definitely a red alert for your love life.
Why are you afraid of commitment?
The reason behind your fear of commitment can be summed in one sentence. You don’t want change!
You may be afraid of change, you may be unsure of what could happen in the future, or it could be just about any other reason associated with change. But it all comes down to this. You don’t want a new unpredictable change in your life because you’re afraid you may not like the change.
But instead of confronting the real fear *change*, you look for a million reasons to justify why you should stay away from commitment. And without realizing it, you’d start picking flaws and faults in your partner just to stay away from commitment. But once you start picking flaws, you can never truly respect your partner or love them the way you once did. And that, my friend, is the beginning of the end of your relationship.
Admit it, for whatever reason it may be, you’re afraid of commitment because you’re uncertain about what may happen in future. And that thought scares you!
If you need to overcome your fear of commitment, you need to learn to confront your fear. Why are you really afraid of commitment?